Can't it stop?

I'm going to lose everything. There's almost no way around it. I'm going to lose one, could easily lose two, and there's a significant possibility that my best friend just isn't going to be available much anymore. I need to pull my life together somehow, but I'm so far beyond that capability that I don't think I can. I don't even know exactly who I can count on to help me. Sure, all my friends would be there for me if I asked, but is anyone really going to want/be able to be there as much as I need them right now? I really don't know. I don't mean to have a total lack of faith in my friends, because they're amazing and they've done more than I could ask, but I'm a lot of work.